7 Signs Your LDR Relationship Is Threatened To Fail
Without spending time together, couples undergoing Long Distance Relationship (LDR) often experience difficulties. Communication is usually only done via chat, phone calls, or video calls. Conditions are even more challenging if you and your partner are in different time zones.
Have you ever felt disconnected from him? Will it only be temporary or a sign that your relationship is becoming vulnerable?
To answer this question, experts give seven signs that your LDR is threatened with failure. Here are among them.
1. Communicating with your partner is tiring
It's normal if you are sometimes not in the mood to reply to your partner's messages. Especially if you have a lot of work or other activities. However, if chatting with him for a long time is tiring and feels like an obligation, that may be a sign the LDR isn't working anymore.
"If you feel that you have no problem chatting with friends or coworkers, but communication with your partner is diminishing, it's time to rethink your relationship," says Jenna Peterson, a relationship expert with Growing Self Counseling and Couching.
2. Your spouse broke the promise of a call or video call
dude. Because you can't meet face to face for months, phone calls and video calls are two ways to communicate. It's okay to miss a call every now and then, maybe something else suddenly gets in your way. However, if it happened frequently, it was really annoying.
"It doesn't matter if they live in another city or even another continent, every LDR partner must consistently make time to stay connected every day," says Nazanin Moali, a sex therapist and host of the Sexology podcast.
“If you often wait for your partner to call and compete with other things for their attention, try to express your disappointment. If your partner doesn't prioritize your relationship, maybe you should move on, ”he added.
3. Your partner is always watching you
There is a difference between checking the situation and always monitoring your activities. Especially if he often asks you where and who you are chatting with today. Out of bounds questions can be a sign of jealousy, distrust, and even toxic controlling behavior.
"Having an LDR requires a high level of mutual trust. Any kind of pressure that arises in a relationship, such as having to be on the alert to take calls or reply to chats, can be a dangerous warning sign, ”says Caroline Madden, marriage and family therapist and author of Fool Me Once: Should I Take Back My Cheating Husband?
4. Your partner does not cooperate to solve problems
Conflict cannot be avoided in a relationship, including in LDR partners. Pay attention to your partner's attitude when you want to solve a problem. Does he pay attention or divert the conversation? Reluctance to resolve conflicts today can cause bigger problems later on.
"In a relationship, it needs continuous communication and commitment to solving problems that occur. If your partner doesn't take it seriously, chances are he is no longer interested in your relationship, ”explained Moali.
5. The separation becomes heavier
"It's sad to split up with your partner and find out that you won't be seeing each other anytime soon," said Peterson.
However, if your feelings of sadness and longing are too big to interfere with your daily activities, then LDR may not be suitable for you. Time to rethink your relationship
6. Not planning for the future together
After undergoing an LDR for some time, usually there are compromises to be together. Either shorten the distance or one of you has moved to the same city.
"In a relationship, usually every couple plans together for the future. Includes a plan to stay physically close. If you never talk about it, maybe it's a sign the relationship will not last long, "said Madden.
Other signs? You two have a plan, but don't tell each other to make it happen.
7. Many times want to have relationships with other people
Moali says, it's normal for you to be attracted to other people. "However, if you continue to look for opportunities to be close to other people, that is a sign that you are not satisfied with your current relationship," he said.
Those are 7 signs that your LDR is threatened with failure. If you experience the signs above, fix or reconsider your relationship, yes, Bela!