Different Education Status with Spouse Becomes a Barrier to Parents' blessing

Not a story to be proud of, but an experience that is said to be the best teacher in the future. I have known him since he was in elementary school, not because we are neighbors or in the same school, but because we are in the same class in the tutoring in my city. Unlike my female friends who are easy to get along with male students, I tend to be quiet.

It can be counted on the fingers how much we communicated in 3 years in the same tutoring class. Perhaps because of that, I didn't have any particular impression of her, let alone having feelings of attraction as a young girl who had just reached puberty. Everything is normal, even until the last day of the tutoring class which is filled with prayers so that all students' national exam results are good and can be accepted in the desired junior high school.

It seems that the separation in tutoring is not the end, because when I went to the junior high school level, I was in the same class as 4 of my friends in tutoring: 3 girls, and another one who I will call Adit. Don't imagine that we will be close just because we are not used to new friends, I do need a few days to get used to the new environment, but Adit is a person who is easy to get along with, he looks very familiar with his classmates and my other friends.

I am an ordinary young woman who can be said to be less concerned with the problem of monkey love. Many say I am not sensitive to the codes given by the boys who chat with me, but I consider it purely to ask about lesson problems, one of which is Adit. We were often in the same group of subjects, and also got closer after he often asked me about poorly understood formulas.

Familiarity in the guise of friendship probably made me, who at that time did not understand the context of love, misinterpreted what happened between us. After the announcement of junior high school graduation, we are officially dating. Not without reason I accept it, I think that he is a good person. Not grumpy, devotes time to his positive hobbies, and in my view he is not the kind of restraining guy some of my friends have experienced.

The first year we dated, everything happened normally, even though it's not like Korean dramas or teen fiction genre films that present high school romantic scenes. Nor was he the type of bad boy who couldn't live without a cigarette, and the main thing was that he didn't mind us dating healthy. What I am grateful for is that I am still free to move and develop my hobbies in several extracurricular activities even though we are different schools, without any restrictions from it.

Everything started to feel strange to me when we were in class XI, at first I thought maybe his controlling attitude which slowly began to change to restraint was based on because he didn't want to separate despite being different schools, but over time I began to feel he was overreacting. Asking me to stop taking extracurricular activities, which he said was afraid of being tired, turned into an order to stop extracurricular activities because of blind jealousy if I collaborated with male extracurricular members.

He also often got angry and acted harshly. Several times he met him searching the contents of my cellphone, but instead of the expression of relief that was etched on his face because of his openness about the contents of the cellphone, he was even angry and he began to dare to do physical violence just because I had not left the extracurricular group according to his request. At that time I was already thinking about running away, because to be honest I was starting to be afraid of him, not to mention that everything I did looked wrong and was always scorned with his dirty words.

But the day after the incident he apologized, I still forgive him because I feel comfortable with him, thinking the incident was just an error. But a series of similar incidents occurred again, even after I left the extracurricular group. She got mad just because I did my homework without telling her. We rarely see each other, but I'm even relieved, because every time we meet at least he will yell at me.

For a year I persisted with him, with yelling, insults, and also physical violence, my sanity finally urged me to stop and be indoctrinated automatically that the love that was offered as the basis for him doing it and also when apologizing after the incident was just his obsession. I finally made it clear to him that I wanted us to stop dealing with the reason that his attitude had gone too far.

Honestly at that moment I felt relieved and I thought everything was over. But it turns out that life is not always simple. He sent me short messages via SMS, BBM and WA. It doesn't contain the word sorry or ask for feedback, but it all contains insults about me. I was devastated for being put down by someone I trusted.

It's been five years I have an affair with him, to be precise since I entered high school I've been dating him. Actually my parents did not allow me to date while I was still in school. But the flurry of romance in adolescence made me close my eyes and ears to parental advice, on September 8, 2012 I was officially dating him, until now until now I am already in my 6th semester.

He is just a simple man who only received elementary school education, because economic factors made him unable to continue his education and he is my own neighbor who is still in the same RT with me. But he is a person who is very quiet and ignorant of girls, that's why I was attracted to him.

During my high school years he often took me to school, he also often gave me things I needed. But that was only done when he was at home because he often migrated to the city to work, while I stayed in the village because I was still in school.

I was only at home together with my younger brother, who was still in junior high school at that time, my parents migrated to Jakarta to look for sustenance to pay for my sister and my school. In 2015 I graduated from high school when I was still confused whether I should continue my education or work. I was confused because one of the factors was that he only graduated from elementary school, he also objected if I had to go to college.

After going through the turmoil and heavy mental pressure from my parents, I finally decided to go to college. I also really want to achieve my goals by continuing to study. He finally agreed that the longer he supported me in college, he always accompanied me to work on assignments, he always paid attention to my studies.

Once upon a time my mother advised me that I must be successful. I also have to have a companion who is highly educated and well-established because my mother wants me to be happy one day and be able to live well. The words that were my mother's advice were always spoken and heard to my boyfriend's mother. Instead, he was advised that he should look for mediocre women who do not have to be highly educated because they are equal to him. But we don't budge, we still maintain a very burning love because there is nothing wrong with love even though there are differences in caste.

We are not discouraged and discouraged. We are still struggling to prove that we deserve a sense of belonging. Even so he always took care of me, kept my honor as a woman. But there is a problem that really makes us almost give up. At that time he came to my house, because I was not feeling well.

The room neighbors found out about this, and we were almost raided. Everyone thought we were having an illicit relationship and the news was known by my parents, which eventually my parents returned from Jakarta just to confirm the news. My parents came home and met my boyfriend, my mom cursed him.

Shed tears because of his deep disappointment. I've been gloomy since that incident, I'm increasingly not sure about a relationship with him. Until finally we met somewhere secretly so that the family would not know. At that time I gave my mother permission to do an assignment at a friend's house.

I had to lie because I had to talk to him to make sure where the relationship we had built was going. We met, I hugged him tightly, I couldn't even cried. He strengthened me, he held my hand tightly that he would still fight to defend me and would not give up to get the blessing of my parents.

When Eid day arrives, the tradition in the village is to gather to forgive each other. But the unexpected happened, my boyfriend was publicly humiliated by my own mother. My mother refused when invited to shake hands with my boyfriend. I can so see and feel how hurt my boyfriend is. But I can't do anything about it because my parents don't approve of the relationship between me and him. But we still try to maintain our relationship, because our love is not just love and we want to prove that our love is worth fighting for.

Day after day we have passed together, problem after problem we both face and still with the same feelings and dreams to get the blessing of our parents are still burning. He kept trying to convince my parents that he sincerely loved me, he promised to work hard to make me happy. He always asks and smiles every time he meets my mother even though his heart hurts, because my mother never responded to his greeting.

Me and him have been dating for almost 6 years but are still facing the same situation that is not getting the blessing of our parents